At first thought, zombies seem like evil monstrosities. Sure they eat brains and leave body parts all over the place – but the lessons one can learn from a zombie far outweigh their health risks. One brave author (now, alas, undead) spent some time with the zombies in disguise, took what he learned from them, and adapted zombie life lessons into The Zen of Zombie. This book is special. It will not help you kill zombies, but it will teach you to think like one and “reanimate yourself for success.” ‘But what can I learn from zombies?’ you are asking yourself. The answer: plenty. In The Zen of Zombie you’ll learn some interesting skills, such as: How to adapt to anything life (or the living) throws at you How to slow down How to remove prejudice from your life (a brain is a brain is a brain) How to find strength in numbers (zombie Horde, anyone?) How to stop negotiating and start demanding what you want (zombies don’t settle for a nose – they want the brain) How to make each word count (zombies want brains, zombies say “brains”) and much, much more! You’ll also learn the 24 habits of highly effective zombies and you’ll work through the 90 day guide to a better, more zombified you. Because the true way to inner peace requires you to become like the undead. Oohhmmmmmmmbbbrrrains.
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Congratulations! We’re glad you’re ready to fight for zombie rights. This article outlines some of the steps involved and the associated pitfalls to avoid when planning a successful zombie gathering. Leadership. As you know, it is vital that some of the living remain in positions of leadership in the organization to provide the necessary motivation and thought-process behind running a large organization. Although, for consistency, you probably want your highest official to be a zombie in order to have him speak incoherently at corporate meetings and drool convincingly in discussions with politicians. However, leadership at the event should be an intelligent human, sympathetic to zombie rights. As the event coordinator, this human can provide guidance via a megaphone and also serves as a rallying point around which zombies will gather. Occasionally this “gathering” leads to “dismemberment” so you want to ensure that your event coordinator is expendable. This position fits nicely for zombie-rights activists hoping to transition to the less-demanding, zombie lifestyle. Attendance. You might have a whole legion of supporters, but it’s important to mobilize your zombie protesters so that they show up on the day of the event. Plan ahead so that folks can put it on their calendars. You can notify the mindless via your MySpace or Facebook account. Pass out leaflets to ensure the interested are notified. We’ve found that promising that there will be beer and brains brings the college-aged zombies out en masse in particular. Location. We recommend a popular location with high-visibility for maximum exposure to the uninitiated. Although some organizations prefer the march, we find it easier to choose a specific place to protest. Shambling does not lend itself to marching, and zombies tend to get distracted more easily while in motion. Check with your local city hall to find out if you need a permit to gather at the location you’ve chosen. Remember that some of your supporters undoubtedly have physical impairments, so ensure your site is fully accessible. Coverage. It’s important to get your event covered by the media so that your reach is greater than those present at the event. After all, they all may have been eaten, even the well-intentioned, amenable-to-Zombie-rights ones (sometimes they’re the tastiest). Documentary film makers, such as George A. Romero, are an indispensable resource in getting the word out. Make use of them as whenever possible. “Zombies Were People Too” on a sandwich-board-clad zombie in black, blood red, and rotting-flesh green on a military green, 100% cotton t-shirt.
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Once there was a poet, but he was infected by the zombie virus. He continued writing, however, and this book is the story of his transformation, hunger, and eventual acceptance of his new zombie life. And the crazy part is: this book is written entirely in haiku. That’s why it’s called: Zombie Haiku. It is a document from the early days of the zombie plague – a facsimile of his actual journal recounting the events of humanity’s darkest hours through the intimate poetry of haiku. Lying on the road, a few ate until they burst. I eat what burst out. Inside Zombie Haiku, you’ll find increasingly disjointed and terrifying three-line poems (all in the classic 5-7-5 syllable structure), and follow the undead poet on a journey through deserted streets and barricaded doors. It’s actually a narrative, in a way, tracing his path of destruction through a retirement home, an airport, and so much more. Experience every eye-popping, gut-wrenching, flesh-eating moment of the eventual downfall of the human race from the point of view of a zombie, and gain insight to help you survive – in haiku! Brains, BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS. BRaiNS, brains, Brains, BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS. BRAINS, BRains, brains, BRAINS, brains.
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Mr. Zombie had a hard day. The morning was full of dodging shotgun blasts and locals with shovels. He had a light lunch (two brains, a kidney, seven feet of intestine, and a peppermint patty he found on the ground) and then decided to check out his favorite discotheque. There he spied the most heinous zombie girl in the world. He ran into the bathroom to make sure he was disgusting enough to chat her up. It was then Mr. Zombie discovered his breath reeked of peppermint! What to do? No worries – Mr. Zombie popped a Zombie Mint And how, you may wonder, did Mr. Zombie combat one mint with another? It’s because Zombie Mints were made with the living dead in mind. They taste just like rotting brain. You probably think we’re joking. You probably think these really just taste like sweet little peppermints. But you are wrong; dead wrong. Zombie Mints are not to be trifled with. They are Undead Approved for stinkening your breath. Are you brave enough to try some? Go on . . . we dare you. For nutrition information, click here.
List Price: Price: 6.99
Is it Nazi Zombies or Zombie Nazis? I’m not sure, but whatever you call ‘em, there’s no better fun than filling some Nazi Zombies full of lead. [click to continue…]
The biohazard threat has not ended: Just when it seemed that the menace of Resident Evil had been destroyed, along comes a new terror to send shivers down players’ spines. Chris Redfield, returning Resident Evil hero, has followed the path of the evil literally around the globe. [click to continue…]
The biohazard threat has not ended: Just when it seemed that the menace of Resident Evil had been destroyed, along comes a new terror to send shivers down players’ spines. Chris Redfield, returning Resident Evil hero, has followed the path of the evil literally around the globe.
